A lot of my issues stem from trust problems. I can’t blame any one particular spot in my life, because my gullibility was taken advantage of frequently. I let these processes dull my senses, I made excuses to not confront feelings or hurt or betrayal. In hindsight I think I believed “If I convince my self that I am the negative people say, it can no longer hurt me.”

It’s really, really hard to get back up if you let everyone label you. You know who you are,an if you are not bonded by a God by religion, think back on childhood. Child like faith that you maybe had in an idol, or sport or person, GIVE IT BACK TO YOURSELF. As much as I am compelled to ask you, find a good nondenominational church, I am just as much compelled to ask you to believe in LIFE.


When I let go of stigma, I allowed myself to love and trust again. I am with my soul mate because I took back and owned my faith in love.

Anyone can say whatever they want about you, but YOU WAKE UP TO YOU daily! You have a heart that defies gravity. The very act of your heartbeat is amazing. You are amazing!
If you’re selfish, or free lover! If you’re a grade A student or a hard worker! If you’re inventive or you go with the flow!

Each an every person is so unique and getting up every day, is a little gift you give yourself.
Don’t give your gift away, look at yourself, and say
HELLO Miracle!”


Hush it, Not much for prosperity gospel

I was listening to Joyce Myers an while I don’t agree with everything she says,she said something very profound. My husband an I have always had issues with people who had no problem speaking on what we didn’t do good enough(Now or in the past), or what we did wrong. We have great plans for 2016 and if it’s in God’s  will we pray our small family has freedom.

   I don’t expect things to be positive and flowers all the time. I am all for constructive criticism and HELPING someone move past hang ups that no longer exist or are dying. I will no longer accept any negative things spoken into my life or the ones I love. If you don’t have something nice to say, God bless it if it comes out of your mouth because you better be willing to help change it.

    Joyce said in her sermon
“Well God I stopped being negative and nothing good has rewarded it.” And she looked into the Word of God and felt his response was
“It doesn’t do any good just to Shut Up, you got to start saying The Right Things.”

My 2016 isn’t full of resolutions, it’s full of intent.

I pray and hope everyone has a blessed and Safe New Years Eve. Hope to see you flourish in 2016.

Pushing Boundaries

I think I speak for a lot of parents when I say, I struggle with the ideas of giving my child the strongest start. Am I doing it right? How can I do it better?

I believe it’d be crazy if I didn’t have these thoughts. We all want the best for our children, not just survival, but THRIVING. This is why I chose homeschool to start with. As a family I want us to be able to pray, eat, learn and serve God the way we feel called. I didn’t choose home school to shelter him (sometimes I wish I could) but for him to have the freedom out of a classroom.

I love that he is what some people would call nosey. I fear an adore how quick he is to want to connect with all types of people. As much as the time at home will help him focus, the freedom to travel and have experiences mean just as much in his development.

Tomorrow starts our first day of homeschooling. As much as he will benefit, I pray we as a family will grow as well.
Grow closer to God
And to serving His Church.

“You can do great things and still miss a relationship with the Creator”-Jeremy momentum church


This statement stood out to me at church today. All within my life I’ve felt the call from God to do ministry. I’ve always went with the wordly things that struck doubt.

Excuses were:
“If I do ministry I can’t do rock music.”

“Where has God been for me?”

“If I do ministry how will I provide for my son? Single moms don’t have the right to strive to preach God’s word.”

“These people have shown me that I’m not worthy.”

“I’m married now, I have a son and a step daughter an a husband. I really want to adopt one day, and we’re broke. How can I, Lord?”

I know ignoring your calling makes the golden calf an idols look so much more easier. Ignoring your calling makes your relationship with Jesus strained. I hope in time prayer and reading scripture, God will show me the doors to walk thru and the ones to shut.

Pray with me? Pray for me?

Racial injustice can not be spoken for Anyone by Everyone

I have been raised around a multitude of cultures, I’ve had male and female role models of all races. I’ve seen things as a Christian perspective, a mixed child that passed for “white” , as a Pagan, as someone who has had family well off an family that’s been poor.

  I feel like at the core we are all guilty of not looking as people as just people. That everyone is someones’ Child, (if you’re Christian) even as Everyone is God’s child. We forget in heated moments we all have originated from the same places, we all bleed the same. We all have difficulties.   
   Our selfish wants an idolisms of making things more than they should be gets us in trouble with each other more often than not. I have had a few run ins with cops, once was at 14 an I got re handcuffed and pushed into a cop car door. I don’t know what it’s like to be singled out because of skin tone. I do know what it’s like to hear a race talk about Mexicans or Native Americans in front of me and when I say “I’m Mexican/Native, that’s not true of me or my family.” and get looks of shock and shame. I also can’t imagine how our Creator must feel, an that hurts.

     I hope in time a solution that comforts people comes. I hope in time my children are comforted by their faith and by their beliefs. I grieve greatly at every life lost, no money, no protests, no deaths can ever bring people back. I hope in time, peace is found. This is all I can say, all I will say.

Everyone’s action speaks for the future and for the moment,
Think on that. I will be holding myself accountable.

Praying peaceĀ© By: C.A.S.

Praying for justice
Begging for peace
Please remember Your mercy
Because I know not Your reasoning.
Praying for Justice
Begging for Peace
Remember Your mercy
Because I know not Your reasoning.
Why do I feel entitled to know why,  when I am just speck? Really just a second in time.
You say I am fearfully made,
You say I am Your child.
With all the fear of the world,
I confuse it with fear of the Lord.
All good things also come in Your graces.
I must remain mindful.
I must remain true.
You’ve all Your answers in the Gospel.
As a Christian, that’s my truth.
Praying for Justice
Begging for peace.
Remembering Your grace,
For I know not Your reasoning.

The discouragement is real…

Sometimes life gets ahead of you. Sometimes you get so tired of repeating yourself to people that you question of they care at all. I feel like they’re so wrapped up in how they want to feel, they careless about how I feel.
Business is not how I hoped it’d be. A lot of promises and no follow thru.

A lot of any reason I keep going is faith based right now. Lots of prayer and meditation. Letting go… I’m really over some people an I’m tired of hurting.
I know I need to slow down and start dividing the day in moments. Anything else right now is too much.